Twice Jesus asked Peter “Do you agape me”? Both times Peter answered “You know I phileo you”. Then Jesus gave up and asked a third time “Do you phileo me? Peter became agitated at this point. The Holy Spirit changed Peter from the inside after this to agape Jesus. So too with us.
If Ours isn't either female or male, why do my Christian mission mates keep referring to It with male pronouns? "It" and "Its" are all that's needed to refer to Good.
I don’t pretend to be a Greek or Hebrew language scholar, but can search the original words like we all can, so I see in John 21:15-17 where Jesus and Peter are using Agape and Philia a powerful juxtaposition of terms, that needs some careful consideration.
Most scholars will say that Jesus was trying to encourage Peter to rise to the level of the Godly type of Agape love, but Peter could not get above the friendship Philia love.
The context of this discussion between Peter and Jesus is that it occurred just a couple of weeks after Jesus’ resurrection, when he called the Apostles to have breakfast with him on the beach:
"When they had finished breakfast, Jesus asked Simon Peter, "Simon, son of John, do you love (Agape) me more than these?" Peter told him, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love (Philia) you. "Jesus told him, "Feed my lambs." Then he asked him a second time, "Simon, son of John, do you love (Agape) me?" Peter told him, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love (Philia) you." Jesus told him, "Take care of my sheep." He asked him a third time, "Simon, son of John, do you love (Philia) me?" Peter was deeply hurt that he had asked him a third time, "Do you love (Philia) me?" So, he told him, "Lord, you know everything. You know that I love (Agape) you!" Jesus told him, "Feed my sheep”. (John 21:15-17)
While Agape is used in many important scriptures, it’s not strictly speaking a Godly love, but (according to Strong’s Concordance) it’s more a general, social or moral love. In comparison, Philia is a more personal and intimate love, between friends.
When Jesus first asked Peter if he loved him, in the social love of Agape, Peter responded with “I love you like a personal friend” with Philia. Jesus then repeated what he said, and Peter responded the same way. Then Jesus asked him a third time, but this time he used the word Philia. We are told that Peter was deeply hurt that he had asked him a third time, "Do you love (Philia) me?" Was this because Jesus asked Peter three times, reminding him of his three denials of Jesus just a few days before, or was it because Jesus questioned the genuineness of his friendship?
The fact that Peter was so grieved at this third question, could imply that Jesus was asking Peter if he really was his friend. If this is the case, then we can see that Peter’s reply is a confession of Jesus’ deep understanding of Peter’s mindset, and that he could not be truly considered to be Jesus’ Philia friend, but did, however, love him in the social Agape sense.
Peter responded to the first two questions by saying “Yes, Lord, you know that I love (Philia) you”. It’s as if he’s saying, “of course Lord, I love you in the social Agape way, because you know that I love you as my close Philia friend”. Jesus then questions his friendship, and Peter is distraught. But in his amazing capacity to come back, Paul quickly realized that Jesus was teaching him the lesson, that God accepted and loved (Agape) him, even though Peter had failed him as his friend (Philia).
This relationship between Agape and Philia is again shown, when Jesus tells the disciples they are his friends: This is My commandment, that you love (Agape) one another as I have loved (Agape) you. No one has greater love (Agape) than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends (Philia). You are My friends (Philia) if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master does. But I have called you friends (Philia), for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. (John 15:12-15)
When Jesus said “No one has greater love (Agape) than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends (Philia).” was he saying that friendship (Philia love) is greater than social and moral (Agape) love? But I am no Greek language scholar, so I certainly can’t say that. But it’s worth considering. However, there are many subtle meanings in the Greek language, as there are in English. In addition, no one could say that any “type of love” is greater than any other, simply because each word is used in its own appropriate application.
Another example of using Agape and Philia in the same sentence, is when Peter tells us that we must add to the friendship of Philia, the moral love of Agape: And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; And to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness (Philia) charity (Agape). …. (2Peter 1:5-8) Personal friendship, it seems, is incomplete without social and moral love for the entire world. We are also told that God so loved (Agape) the world, that he sent Jesus into the world, so that we may believe in him, and gain eternal life. (John 3:16) We too must love the world in this way, if we are to follow the example of Jesus.
Many books have been written on the various types of love in scripture, which, given that we are told that God is love, is not surprising: The one who does not love has not known God. For God is love. (1John 4:8) And we have known and believed the love that God has in us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him. (1John 4:16) Agape is the word used the five times in these two verses, which is perhaps why people claim that Agape is Godly love. However, as we have seen above, God’s love is also toward us as his friends. We also see that God loves us as friends, even when we are being rebellious: As many as I love (Philia), I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent. (Rev 3:19)
We don’t need to become Greek scholars to understand love, we just need to follow the example of Jesus, in order to love him as his friends.
Great article - I was breakdown the the Greek definitions this evening. But now, you got me looking to find the corresponding passages in my Bible and add in these notes!
Twice Jesus asked Peter “Do you agape me”? Both times Peter answered “You know I phileo you”. Then Jesus gave up and asked a third time “Do you phileo me? Peter became agitated at this point. The Holy Spirit changed Peter from the inside after this to agape Jesus. So too with us.
If Ours isn't either female or male, why do my Christian mission mates keep referring to It with male pronouns? "It" and "Its" are all that's needed to refer to Good.
I don’t pretend to be a Greek or Hebrew language scholar, but can search the original words like we all can, so I see in John 21:15-17 where Jesus and Peter are using Agape and Philia a powerful juxtaposition of terms, that needs some careful consideration.
Most scholars will say that Jesus was trying to encourage Peter to rise to the level of the Godly type of Agape love, but Peter could not get above the friendship Philia love.
The context of this discussion between Peter and Jesus is that it occurred just a couple of weeks after Jesus’ resurrection, when he called the Apostles to have breakfast with him on the beach:
"When they had finished breakfast, Jesus asked Simon Peter, "Simon, son of John, do you love (Agape) me more than these?" Peter told him, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love (Philia) you. "Jesus told him, "Feed my lambs." Then he asked him a second time, "Simon, son of John, do you love (Agape) me?" Peter told him, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love (Philia) you." Jesus told him, "Take care of my sheep." He asked him a third time, "Simon, son of John, do you love (Philia) me?" Peter was deeply hurt that he had asked him a third time, "Do you love (Philia) me?" So, he told him, "Lord, you know everything. You know that I love (Agape) you!" Jesus told him, "Feed my sheep”. (John 21:15-17)
While Agape is used in many important scriptures, it’s not strictly speaking a Godly love, but (according to Strong’s Concordance) it’s more a general, social or moral love. In comparison, Philia is a more personal and intimate love, between friends.
When Jesus first asked Peter if he loved him, in the social love of Agape, Peter responded with “I love you like a personal friend” with Philia. Jesus then repeated what he said, and Peter responded the same way. Then Jesus asked him a third time, but this time he used the word Philia. We are told that Peter was deeply hurt that he had asked him a third time, "Do you love (Philia) me?" Was this because Jesus asked Peter three times, reminding him of his three denials of Jesus just a few days before, or was it because Jesus questioned the genuineness of his friendship?
The fact that Peter was so grieved at this third question, could imply that Jesus was asking Peter if he really was his friend. If this is the case, then we can see that Peter’s reply is a confession of Jesus’ deep understanding of Peter’s mindset, and that he could not be truly considered to be Jesus’ Philia friend, but did, however, love him in the social Agape sense.
Peter responded to the first two questions by saying “Yes, Lord, you know that I love (Philia) you”. It’s as if he’s saying, “of course Lord, I love you in the social Agape way, because you know that I love you as my close Philia friend”. Jesus then questions his friendship, and Peter is distraught. But in his amazing capacity to come back, Paul quickly realized that Jesus was teaching him the lesson, that God accepted and loved (Agape) him, even though Peter had failed him as his friend (Philia).
This relationship between Agape and Philia is again shown, when Jesus tells the disciples they are his friends: This is My commandment, that you love (Agape) one another as I have loved (Agape) you. No one has greater love (Agape) than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends (Philia). You are My friends (Philia) if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master does. But I have called you friends (Philia), for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. (John 15:12-15)
When Jesus said “No one has greater love (Agape) than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends (Philia).” was he saying that friendship (Philia love) is greater than social and moral (Agape) love? But I am no Greek language scholar, so I certainly can’t say that. But it’s worth considering. However, there are many subtle meanings in the Greek language, as there are in English. In addition, no one could say that any “type of love” is greater than any other, simply because each word is used in its own appropriate application.
Another example of using Agape and Philia in the same sentence, is when Peter tells us that we must add to the friendship of Philia, the moral love of Agape: And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; And to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness (Philia) charity (Agape). …. (2Peter 1:5-8) Personal friendship, it seems, is incomplete without social and moral love for the entire world. We are also told that God so loved (Agape) the world, that he sent Jesus into the world, so that we may believe in him, and gain eternal life. (John 3:16) We too must love the world in this way, if we are to follow the example of Jesus.
Many books have been written on the various types of love in scripture, which, given that we are told that God is love, is not surprising: The one who does not love has not known God. For God is love. (1John 4:8) And we have known and believed the love that God has in us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him. (1John 4:16) Agape is the word used the five times in these two verses, which is perhaps why people claim that Agape is Godly love. However, as we have seen above, God’s love is also toward us as his friends. We also see that God loves us as friends, even when we are being rebellious: As many as I love (Philia), I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent. (Rev 3:19)
We don’t need to become Greek scholars to understand love, we just need to follow the example of Jesus, in order to love him as his friends.
Great article - I was breakdown the the Greek definitions this evening. But now, you got me looking to find the corresponding passages in my Bible and add in these notes!