In English, we use “love” in many different ways.
We “love” our husband or wife, we “love” the fall weather, we “love” our friends” and we even “love” pizza.
It’s the same word, but obviously, there are slightly different meanings. Hopefully, we love our spouse more than we love our favorite food - although pizza is pretty good.
In the ancient Greek language in which the New Testament was written, they had four different words for love - and all four words meant something different. The four main Greek words for love are 1) Philia, 2) Eros, 3) Storge, and 4) Agape.
1. Philia.
“Philia” or “phileo” refers to the love between close friends or brothers. It shows a personal attachment and has more to do with a person’s feelings and emotions. Compared with “agape,” “philia” “is chiefly of the heart whereas agape is chiefly of the head.”
“Philia” describes the emotional feeling you get when you think about one of your closest friends and how they have always been there for you. “Philia” is the emotion that causes our voices to shake and tears to well up in our eyes when we try to tell our brothers and sisters in Christ how thankful we are for them.
This word often appears as “brotherly love” in the New Testament (Hebrews 13:1; Romans 12:10; 1 Thessalonians 4:9).
2. Eros.
“Eros” refers to the love found in romantic relationships. It refers to the idea of passion and intimacy. We get our English word “erotic” from this word. “Eros” is connected to our idea of “falling in love” and “being in love.”
While the Greek word “eros” doesn’t appear in the New Testament, the idea is included in passages like Hebrews 13:4 when the writer refers to the marriage “bed.”
Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
3. Storge.
“Storge” refers to the love between family members. It’s a strong bond shared by parents, children, and those close enough to be considered family. “Storge” is a “protective love that can withstand hardships and trials.”
Like “eros,” the word “storge” doesn’t appear in the New Testament. However, the opposite form of “storge” is used twice in the New Testament. It’s found in Romans 1:31 and 2 Timothy 3:3 and is translated as “unloving” (NKJV) or “heartless” (ESV).
4. Agape.
“Agape” is probably the Greek word for love we are most familiar with. It’s “unconditional, sacrificial love and Biblically refers to a love that God is (1 John 4:8, 16)” and that God shows (John 3:16; 1 John 4:19). “Agape” is a love of choice, is a love that serves others with humility. It is selfless love, the highest form of the four loves we’ve considered.
“Agape” is the kind of love discussed by Paul in the famous “love chapter” in the New Testament (1 Corinthians 13). God has demonstrated His “agape love” for us (Romans 5:8) - His people are to follow His example and demonstrate that same kind of love to others.
What a blessing that God loves us and has demonstrated His love for us! If we love Him in return, we must demonstrate that by submitting our will to His by obeying Him and serving Him.
If you love [agape] me, you will keep my commandments. (John 14:15)
Twice Jesus asked Peter “Do you agape me”? Both times Peter answered “You know I phileo you”. Then Jesus gave up and asked a third time “Do you phileo me? Peter became agitated at this point. The Holy Spirit changed Peter from the inside after this to agape Jesus. So too with us.
If Ours isn't either female or male, why do my Christian mission mates keep referring to It with male pronouns? "It" and "Its" are all that's needed to refer to Good.