10 Elements of Friendship
Guest post by Victor M. Eskew.
We all know what it means to have a friend, but to define the word is difficult.
The following definitions have been given by others:
The state of being a friend
A form of love between two people
A preference for a particular person
A single soul dwelling in two bodies (Aristotle)
Two people having a mutual desire for companionship
Each one of the above statements describes friendship, but all of them seem to be somewhat inadequate. One of the reasons is because friendship is composed of numerous elements.
In this article, we want to briefly look at each one of the elements of friendship.
Trust
Definition: the placing of one’s care into the hands of another, to rely or put confidence in someone
Proverbs 16:28 – A forward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends.
Quote: “Lay this unto your breast: Old friends, like old swords, still are trusted best” (John Webster).
Love
Definition: the practice of always seeking the best interest of another person
Proverbs 17:17 – A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Quote: “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone gives you courage” (Lao Tzu).
Acceptance
Definition: favorable reception
John 8:11 – She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.
Quote: “A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you” (Elbert Hubbard).
Stick-tuitiveness
Definition: the ability or strength to continue or last, especially despite fatigue, stress, or other adverse conditions
Proverbs 18:24 – A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.
Quote: “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out” (Walter Wenchell).
Support
Definition: to bear or hold up, to sustain under trial or affliction
Proverbs 17:17 – A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Quote: “Friendship multiplies the good of life and divides the evil” (Baltasar Garcia).
Reciprocity
Definition: mutual exchange, back and forth responsibilities, giving and receiving
III John 14 – But I trust I shall shortly see thee, and we shall speak face to face. Peace be to you. Our friends salute thee. Greet the friends by name.
Quote: “Friendship is essentially a partnership” (Aristotle).
Frankness
Definition: direct and unreserved in speech, straight forward, sincere, without inhibition
Proverbs 27:6 – Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
Quote: “My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me” (Henry Ford).
Sympathy
Definition: the act of sharing feelings with another, especially in sorrow or trouble
Job 2:11 – Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this evil that was come upon him, they came every one from his own place; Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite: for they had made an appointment together to come to mourn with him and to comfort him.
Quote: “The rule of true friendship should be mutual sympathy between them, each supplying what the other lacks and trying to benefit the other, always using friendly and sincere words (Marcus Tullius Cicero).
Enjoyment
Definition: a source of satisfaction and pleasure
Luke 15:6 – And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends, and neighbors, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost.
Quote: “We don’t always see each other so when we do its special/fun/exciting” (Anonymous).
Boundaries
Definition: something that indicates bounds or limits, on time, on emotions, and on resources
Luke 22:31-32 – And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you that he may sift you as wheat: but I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.
Quote: “Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to pick up the pieces when it’s all over” (Octavic Bulter).
One has rightly said that “good friendships are life-enhancing.” They are a part of those good gifts that come from God (James 1:17).
Most of us will only have two or three close friendships throughout our lives. Cherish these friendships. Each night thank God for giving you someone who understands, cares, supports, and accepts you through thick or thin.
The article was originally published here.
Victor M. Eskew preaches for the Oceanside church of Christ in Atlantic Beach, Florida.
The church offers a variety of free Bible study courses for anyone interested in studying God’s word. They also have a large archive of videos on their YouTube channel. I appreciate Victor’s teaching in this article!
Thank you
This is a wonderful article , full of good, Christian advice!